|Written by K Thompson
|Monday, 13 June 2011 05:17
|Georgia Crow Pie
Or Why You Should Not Trust the Internet
By Kathy Thompson
Anyone who knows my husband TJ knows he loves to tell wild stories. And he can tell them with a straight face and convincing voice. He has been doing this all of his life, but since retiring five years ago he has shared his considerable skills with daytime telemarketers. What makes him particularly dangerous is the fact that when someone calls in their number flashes on the TV screen tipping him off to an opportunity for fun.
The crow pie line began several years ago. My friends would call and instead of saying, “I’ll get her.” He would announce. “It’ll take a minute to get her; she’s up on the roof catching crows.” The uninitiated would ask Crows! Why? And off TJ would go with a silly tale.
Two months ago he did his crow pie routine to a telemarketer who was calling for Thompson Publishing. He then elaborated and told her about our “business success,” 100 employees, more orders than I could fill etc. A few days later we got an invitation to apply for a Bank of America business credit card. It was addressed to Georgia Crow Pie at our address. Then Newt Gingrich’s office called and asked TJ to listen to a short speech, which he did. A worker asked if he agreed. The pitch was based on the low state of profits in small businesses. Well he started telling her how successful Georgia Crow Pie is and when she asked the secret of success he answered, “Kerosene.” Why yes, every morning, every employer including management takes a teaspoon of kerosene, clears the brain.
TJ was recalled his fun to his sister who was on the internet. Shirley Goggled Georgia Crow Pie and to her amazement found us on www.manta.com . Don’t believe me, try it yourself. Seems we are a Mobile Food-Direct Sales company with $490.00 in sales last year and three employees. And the company president is Eugene Thompson. Eugene because TJ said he was Eugene Splivens. At dinner in a restaurant Rebecca did not believe her Dad’s story until she checked on her ipod.
We continue to get business offers. Most recently Pitney Boles wants to sell us office machines. My worry is when will the IRS believe the internet report and call us in to talk to them about the absence of a tax filing?
Out of curiosity I put -crow pie recipe- in Google and yes they do make crow pies, particularly in New England. Just substitute crow meat for chicken. But you can do more with crow. Consider recipes for Crow Kabobs, BBQ Crow, Creole Crow, pan fried, roasted and my favorite Crow in a Blanket. Maybe we should consider expanding our line of products at Georgia Crow Pie.
There is a crow hunting blog out of Marietta Georgia. Good Ole Boys who talk about hunting crows in South Georgia the way the Paces Ferry crowd talks about quail hunting in South Georgia at hunting plantations. For those of you in New York who are feeling superior go to www.crowbusters.com and find the photo of a New York guy with a dead crow wing between his teeth and the body hanging below. Truthfully it isn’t much different than hunting and shooting other birds, so who am I to judge.
So let’s go back to the point of this story. One is that TJ is nuts, but then you already knew that. And two, the next time you are tempted to believe a questionable report on the internet, remember Georgia Crow Pie.
Georgia Crow Pie was first listed on www.manta.com/c/mttnmsz/georgia-crow-pie in 2007. Five years later we still get credit card applications for Georgia Crow Pie, but Well’s Fargo Bank beat them all. We have been offered a pre-approved line of credit for between $10,000 and $100,000. An application form, with signature lines highlight in yellow highlighter was included, as well as an explanation of the terms. As soon as you pay back any part of the loan you can immediately borrow that amount again. No wonder banks and businesses fail. I know if I filled the form out, or at least I hope, they would discover there is no business, only a crazy T. J. making up stories. But how did it get this far? The telephone company wants to list Georgia crow Pie.
Funniest of all was the latest call. Seems that the local basketball was using team t-shirt sales as a fundraiser and would we like to have our business name on the shirts for $167.00.
I decided to check and see if the manta listing had been updated. In the past information came up instantly, but now one has to register. I decided to do so in order to check on our success, probably not a good idea. This is what I learned.
About Georgia Crow Pie
Annual Revenue $490,000
Years in Business 4
State of Incorporation Georgia
Owner: Eugene Thompson (TJ calls himself Eugene when talking to telemarketers)
The scary thing is that TJ continues to tell wild stories to telemarketers. Who knows, we may soon own other interesting companies.
From Debbie, courtesy of her Mom’s WW II cookbook
Crow and Mushroom Stew
Clean and cut crows into small portions and let them cook a short time in the lard/shortening in a saucepan, being careful not to brown them.
Next, add to the contents of the pan, the stock or gravy, and salt, pepper and cayenne to taste. Simmer 1 hour, or until tender, add mushrooms, simmer 10 minutes more and then stir in cream. Arrange the mushrooms around the crows on a hot platter.
3 bacon slices
stuffing of your choice
1 diced carrot
1 diced onion
hot water or stock
1/4 cup shortening
1/4 cup flour
Clean and dress crows; stuff and place them upright in stew-pan on the slices of bacon. Add the carrot, onion and a little parsley, and cover with boiling water or stock.
Cover the pot and let simmer for 2-3 hours, or until tender, adding boiling water or stock when necessary. Make a sauce of the shortening and flour and 2 cups of the stock remaining in the pan. Serve each crow on a thin slice of moistened toast, and pour gravy over all.
stuffing of your choice
salt and pepper
2 Pie crust mixes
2-3 hard-boiled eggs
Stuff the crow. Loosen joints with a knife but do not cut through.
Simmer the crow in a stew-pan, with enough water to cover, until nearly tender, then season with salt and pepper. Remove meat from bones and set aside.
Prepare pie crusts as directed. (Do not bake)
Make medium thick gravy with flour, shortening, and juices in which the crow has cooked and let cool.
Line a pie plate with pie crust and line with slices of hard-boiled egg. Place crow meat on top. Layer gravy over the crow. Place second pie dough crust over top.
Bake at 450 degrees for 1/2 hour.
Collected by Bert Christensen
Summer Crow Kabobs
|Last Updated on Wednesday, 17 October 2012 03:03